Rape is more of a Psychological trauma and over a period of time women do come out of it once they get settled married , have kids or one fine day when they realise that it was not a rape but consensual and they did'y feel like admitting it. There is no doubt that for a few years they may stay away from men , hate them , wanna kill them for no reason and even get attracted to women , worst case scenario. But do they loose their "womenliness" by getting raped. May be a new world of enlightenement opens up specially for some of the victims who are unaware of what's happening to them . And you never know sometimes after may be a couple of mins women start enjoying it . There is a great saying that " When rape is evident Might well enjoy it" . So how can it be proved that when a women was getting raped she did nt enjoy it at all? Is there a measure of it ? I dont know and I dont think so.
Now lets come to the Bobbytizing part of this discussion . A few years back when a guy was cheating on his wife and she came to know about his other Mis-adventures in bed with other women; one fine day when he was about to make his own wife happy , in the process lost his tool as his wife sliced it and threw it in a river nearby. Now the question is and I am sure any man reading this can understand how it feels to be without one. He cant feel it , can't scrach it and do other necessary things with it.
Women on the other hand has had been mentally tarumatized may be , had some fun in the process may be , got enlightened may be and here this guy is done, come undone.
Now one more thing that arises in my mind is lets take the same situation but reversing the scenerio. A man is raped may be by a women, a man or some alien. If its a women SC does nt categorize it as a rape , Men can 't be raped they say , ask Mr Michael Douglas who was literally raped by Demi Moore in some movie based on a Novel by Micheal Crichton. Why this Injustice. I am sure rape for man can be more painful than women given a certain scenario. Now coming to the seconf scenario but I am sorry how to put it , oh I cant cause there is no scenario in the women's case, they can't be Bobbytized.
I asked a guy once which crime do you hate most? His answer was a crime which when I commit is fine but if some other man commits is the worst . He was referring to rape indirectly.
I think no matter what a crime is and how bad it can be if the motive of the crime can be justified for example if your neihbour tries and rape your daughter and in return you also do it , it can be justified. But when there is no good motive like you are drinking and driving and you kill someone, you are done , no defendable motive at all. Unless and Untill you were having "great fun " in the car with your women friend and she just enjoyed it soo much that she bites your manliness leaving you handicapped and one man dead.
Its all perspective , is what I ahve realized and now again mine can be differnet from yours.
I started this blog to write something meaningful and now again its the readers perspective.
Abhishek
Finally a long awaited "Sharma Thoughts". Good read...
ReplyDeleteAwaiting many other thoughts :)
Cutting off a man's manliness is not even in the same ballpark as raping a woman. Women say being punched in the breast is like kicking a man in the balls; it's not, not even close. If a bobbetized man does not get immediate medical attention, he bleeds out. You don't need to be a medical doctor to realize and understand this. Rape is not about sex but control; so a man can be 'raped' with objects, which can be more demoralizing than a woman being conventionally raped. Not sure, not an expert. Women who bobbetize men should be charged with attempted murder and thrown in prison.
ReplyDeleteNice start to the blog Sharma, keep it up as you always have a very unique perspective on things. Not sure everyone would agree with your 'he raped my daughter so I will rape his' justification for rape, but it is a viewpoint, one I know you'll defend.
Hmm..interesting view point. I guess both crimes are uncalled for. I do not agree with your viewpoint when you say 'an eye for an eye'. Not quoting Gandhiji, but i still feel that is not the right solution.
ReplyDeleteIts a complicated subject and you are writing from a totally male perspective. I would love to listen to some females comment on your thoughts. That would give you and us, a different angle to look at this topic.
Here is one female opinion: I completely disagree with you!
ReplyDeleteHow can it be proven that a woman "didn't enjoy it at all?" And how do you prove it? Well, how about starting with asking the women who have experienced it - I'm sure that 99% would say that it was neither a pleasurable nor enlightening experience. I'm not saying that being "bobbitized is any less of a crime...how about this: they are equally horrible.
And how can you justify hurting an innocent person just because you or someone you love was harmed? That just starts a vicious cycle...
Ok, so this is what I have to say. Rape and bobbitising are both heinous crimes which cannot and should not be compared. Rape is a crime of power. It is disappointing to see people talk and debate about rape as if they are experts in the field of violence against women and give gyan that it can be an enlightening experience for women. There are only 3 ways someone can understand and talk sense aout rape- one if you are a woman; 2- if you are a man but is sensitive and acknowledges the reality of violence against women and 3- to put it crudely, if you have been anally (sexually) violated by someone who enjoyed watching you helpless and humiliated and was aroused by it. If you have experience of neither of the above, please spare us the irritation by not talking about rape.
ReplyDeleteIn your last paragraph on justifying a crime (and u unfortunately picked rape), you so very conveniently turned women into objects like cattle or house... Think about it...
"There are only 3 ways someone can understand and talk sense aout rape- one if you are a woman; 2- if you are a man but is sensitive and acknowledges the reality of violence against women and 3- to put it crudely, if you have been anally (sexually) violated by someone who enjoyed watching you helpless and humiliated and was aroused by it."
ReplyDeletewtf Junge?
so you say that all women, de facto, understand rape, even though you said it's about power? a middle-aged housewife living in the suburbs doesn't know more about and understand rape than I do, just cause she is a woman. she may fear it more, however, and rightfully so. statistics prove that.
and if I, a man, all of a sudden say that I watched an enlightening movie about rape, can I now join in on the discussion? doubtful. only those who have actually been raped know what it's about. so your third point is valid, but has to be generalized to people, not just men.